My work days are difficult these days. I spend most of my work days actually working maybe an hour a day. The rest is spent watching television shows on YouTube – I wrapped up Season One of “Criminal Minds” today – or working on photo books on Shutterfly. Most people would say I have it easy and I should enjoy it. The truth is that it sucks. I hate it. For the record, I *would* rather be watching television shows than being complained to by angry customers (and there are plenty of those), but I feel completely useless and worthless. I haven’t been much fun to be around these days. I know it and I admit it. I try to control it, but it’s hard. It’s easier when I’m at home because of Andy and the kids, but then I have to get up and go to work. I’ve applied for several jobs, but there isn’t much out there right now. It’s extremely angering and frustrating. I feel like I have been hung out to dry and that fifteen years worth of knowledge is crap now. On more than one occasion, varying people have said, “How do YOU know that?” What I really want to say is, “I’ve worked here for 15 years, you stupid idiot. Maybe if you shut your damn mouth and listened and then ACTED, I would still have a job. Of course, I know these things. I’ve worked here 15 YEARS!” Instead, I do all that I can to help. I want to stay at the University and I can’t afford to burn my bridges. It’s so hard and the stress of it all is wearing me down. I hate feeling useless and worthless. I hate it.