….will always work for the people who know why.  That was the quote from a serious discussion at work today regarding my long-term future.  I can finally relax a bit about the possibility of my office closing.  It looks as though we will finish the year in the black, wiping away last year’s deficit.  Over the years and I’ve worked there since October of 1997, my job has gone through multiple transformations.  At times, I felt unneeded there.  Other times, I felt like nothing would get done without me.  Most recently, I feel a bit lost.  Like I’m somewhere between caring and not caring with a side of burnout thrown in.  I’ve done some looking for a new job, but there is nothing out there right now and I’m really not sure that I want to give up everything I’ve worked for in my current position.  I’ve been a person that “knows why” for a long time having been part of management since 2001.  My Director and Assistant Director would like to increase my “knowing why” to include some other areas of the office besides just Development.  While I like the idea in theory, my current mood makes it difficult to want to try it.  I have gone through periods like this before, but this particular funk has been more difficult to work through and ignore.  What’s sad is that I’m very fortunate to have a well-paying job with loads of flexibility, yet I can’t seem to pull myself from the funk to truly appreciate that.  Ironic that as a person who “knows why” regarding my organization, I can’t seem to “know why” I can’t work myself out of this funk.  Maybe this change in direction to include other things will be the jumping off point that I need.  All I know is I certainly need something.